Life is gourd.

This is my number one favorite tradition each year (probably). While I have and would just be a pumpkin head by myself, it is incredibly special to have my partner join in the fun. We pick out the pumpkins at the patch (except for one year when we did an emergency gather and shoot), carve them together, and then giggle our way through shooting. You can't really know your partner until they've got copious amounts of pumpkin guts in their hair (or beard). 

While I have certain poses I love to do each time, it's fun to mix things up. Pinterest always comes in handy here. I just searched "pumpkin head poses" and saved images to my phone that I wanted to recreate. It's helpful when you're trying to hurry through because 1) pumpkins are heavy and 2) it's hot and you're sweaty. Also, some people are just downright hilarious and I can't think of everything. 

Our carving went so much more quickly this year. I actually remembered to grab the pumpkin carving tools from storage when I brought over the Halloween decorations. Using giant knives and kitchen spoons really isn't as easy as using those cheap plastic tools from the kits. Although, I do think using a regular spoon to carve out a hollow under the steam is a lot easier. Maybe because it's smaller and sharper? I may never know. I do know that it didn't take ages and clean up was so much easier. 

For outfits, I truly love to keep it as normal as possible. I have so many Halloween themed pieces that would work and be really funny, but I truly believe these stand out because we're wearing normal clothes. My outfit was one I wore on our last night in London, but it didn't really get photographed. I love it so much. The lace top is so comfortable and I'll never be over these boots that I bought at TK Maxx. You can shop the pieces here. 

All of that to say, if you've been thinking about putting a pumpkin on your head, you absolutely should. It's a hilariously fabulous time and you'll have videos and photos to cherish and laugh at years from now. 

Awkward Couple Photo Shoot

We're always on the lookout for fun things to do together, and we really hit the jackpot with the JCPenney Awkward Couple Photo Shoot. In June, we were really trying to ensure we had at least one day a week for a date as our weekends had really filled up with events. I have had this on my to-do list for quite some time and decided to pull the trigger.

It was incredibly easy to set up. We scheduled a slot online. It's about a 15-20 minute shoot window. In preparation, I made this Pinterest board for inspiration. We were told to arrive about 10-15 minutes early to the shoot. They specifically asked us if we were doing this style of photo shoot, so I think it's pretty popular. Our photographer, Isaac, was phenomenal. He really got into it as much as we did. We knew we were nailing it when he would lower his head and laugh after certain poses. Speaking of poses, he also knew the name for each one (I've definitely forgotten what they were) and that made it so much more fun and hilarious. We made it through nearly every inspiration photo on the board. 

After the shoot, we waited about 10 minutes for them to edit the photos and spent all of 5 seconds deciding to buy each one. There was a little bit of sticker shock, but honestly, it was very worth it. I would try to find a deal or coupon before you go, though I get the feeling they're always running some kind of deal. Highly recommend for couples or families/siblings. 

We then headed out for a boozy lunch while we waited to receive the digital downloads. Beware, you get the email for the photos about 3 hours later, but as they work with Shutterfly, it takes about 24 hours for them to properly load. 

As someone who loves taking photos, it was really fun to be silly. I tried to not take the shoot too seriously and I think that really worked for the look of the images. The best time was had.

                             

Parallel Play

I have really been digging into my relationships lately. I want to be a better friend and I also want to have better friendships. There was a moment in my life when all I wanted were cancelled plans. Now? I am quite peeved when plans are cancelled (unless there is a very good, specific reason). 

Even as an individualistic person, the individualism that is plaguing our society is making my skin crawl. People say they want a village, but they refuse to be a villager. 

Before I dig myself a little too deep, let me say that our mental health has been plummeting as a society. We do need to be better as a society and as individuals in helping to create better mental health spaces and breaks. But the answer to that has become "self-care" in the sense that it's okay to cancel plans when you just don't feel like going. It is always of upmost importance to keep your mental health a priority. You should do the things that make you feel better. And if those things are always cancelling plans because you're "too tired", it's not self-care, it's isolation (or maybe your friends aren't that great).

As I've gotten older (hello, 37), I've realized that my friendships are so important and that it takes actual work to keep them going. I've known this for awhile (I mean, duh), but it's never been more apparent now. I have a job that I enjoy that keeps me busy during actual working hours. I am in a relationship/partnership with someone that actually wants to be around me and who I want to be around. I have a select group of girlfriends that I want to see on a regular basis. And I absolutely cherish my alone time. That is a lot to juggle. And juggle it we must. 

Because our hanging out culture is dominated by drinking and going out culture, I can see how easy it is for people to opt out. You're spending money, drive time, and social battery points. It's a lot. And it's hard. Don't get me wrong, I love a fabulous night out with my girlfriends, but I have been very into home hangouts as of late. I came across this article about parallel play for adults and while I've been doing this for awhile, I never realized this was what it was. 

Parallel play is when two individuals are doing things separately, but together. For instance, when my partner and I are both on the couch and I'm reading while he's playing a video game. We stop and chat throughout, we're connecting, but we're in our own worlds as well. Parallel play is easy to do with a live in significant other or roommate. And it's becoming a way to hang out with your friends. A rather perfect way to hang out with friends, if I do say so myself. Planning a craft or admin day with my friends is so much fun. We get to hang out, but we don't have to completely deplete our social batteries or spend a ton of money. And we might just get something checked off a list in the meantime. If you're looking for ways to parallel play with your friends (or partner), try these:

• reading by the pool
• chore/admin day
• paint/color/diamond art and sip
• scrapbook/knit/embroider/etc.
• scroll social media
• watch a movie or TV show
• have an analog only day

I think people get in their heads a little too much when it comes to hanging out. If you're comfortable with a person, silence isn't awkward, it can be a little bit of a blessing. Natural silences are the best with the right person or people. If you're at dinner with someone, maybe put the phone down or away. But sitting side by side on the sofa while scrolling and showing each other funny videos occasionally is also a wonderful, battery charging experience. 

Creating your village takes work and it takes you showing up. Sometimes showing up might be the hardest thing you do in a day, but it is always worth it (kind of like a workout). It's really easy to joke about cancelling plans, but when you're doing it all the time, it might be a good time to take a look at the why. Also, as someone who loves to host, being cancelled on really sucks (when there is no good reason). Figure out what works for you and your village. Try mixing in a few couch hangs with activities (or not) with an alfresco dinner and drinks. And, maybe, just maybe, say no when you don't want to do something. You can always change it to a yes later! 

Reds, greens, and blues - Oh my!

One of the many dressing goals I have this year is to try colors I wouldn't normally pair together. And did we really hit the nail with this outfit. I saw this post by Julia Berlozheimer and just knew I needed to figure out how to recreate it with pieces from my wardrobe. 

I had to mix around a lot of the colors, but I got there in the end. And I haven't actually worn this skirt for a real outfit (just costumes) in such a long time. I've long adored this green and red together, but adding in the different blues makes it pop so much more. I really can't get over it. The broach truly adds that special touch this outfit would otherwise be missing. Julia did have pops of yellow in her outfit and I do wish I had something that could have brought that out (mainly a yellow shoe). A yellow ballet flat or sandal has been added to my wish list! 

While I never really thought of my outfits as beige or boring, I was becoming stagnant with solids and wearing the same colors over and over again. And, yes, wearing a lot more neutrals. Don't get me wrong, I love a good neutral, but I can't abide a boring neutral outfit. Mixing colors that are surprising is a lot more fun and maybe a tiny bit easier to put together than an exciting neutral outfit. Maybe that depends on the weather and my mood! 

I hope to continue finding new and exciting ways to pair colors this year. Maybe I should dive into a giant box of crayons for some inspiration. Inspiration does seem to pop up in unlikely places! I can say my eyes are open way more than they were last year. 

Notes + Favorites #6

Okay, maybe I'm not great at keeping up with these. But I am still here, so I think that is what matters. We're trying to create a habit and that looks messy sometimes. 

Speaking of habits, I did my first run of the year. I started running in February last year, but woof, it's been cold, snowy, and rainy (I no longer have a gym at my fingertips). My endurance has definitely taken a hit, but I felt strong and I was in the 12 minute mile time (I know, it's not great, but it's good for me!). I have two days scheduled during the week for shorter runs (3-4 miles) and Saturday for longer miles (5-10 miles). 

As you can see, I'm reading quite a few books at once. I did actually finish No Country for Old Men, but wanted to leave it on here. I'm trying to get all the Goodreads challenges completed before the end of the month. Just three more books. They're all quite different which is great! 

What I'm Reading: No Country for Old Men by Cormac McCarthy, The Diary of Anaïs Nin Volume 1 1931-1934 by Anaïs Nin, Battle of the Bookstores by Ali Brady, and Hekate - The Witch (Goddesses of the Underworld) by Nikita Gill

Word of the Day: virescent /vi·res·cent/ - turning green, greenish

No more beige, instead, double drench. 

Personal style and why bigger might be better. 

This dress is on my wish list.

Getting dressed up and going to a museum is my kind of day.

J. Crew is back! You'll still catch me at J. Crew Factory (hello, budget).

The importance of platonic soulmates.

Just some Coca-Cola things.